After our class discussion today over gender I got to thinking about the endless debate of which gender has it worse. Who actually does have it harder in life? Guys or girls? I'm sure either gender will tell you differently talking about small, insignificant things that effect everyday life. For example, girls have to look good ALL THE TIME, or guys are better with sports, or even that women have to go through pregnancy. All these small things are just ways we can complain that it is harder for us. Is it really though? Or are we more equal than different in this endless everyday struggle? I suppose it all depends on the way in which you view it.
From a historical standpoint, women have always had it worse. We were not given the right to refuse men in marriage, the right to vote, or the right to equal education. For years women have had to fight to try and become equal with men. We have lost property, career advances, and at some level we have even lost our value in life. Not everything can be viewed in the past however, so we have to look at whats happening right now at the day to day level.
Just typing into Google, "who has it worse, boys or girls?" brings up a huge stream of questions and comments like: "who's worse in relationships," "who's worse during puberty,"and "who lives longer." So many aspects go into deciding which gender is really worse off. Take this post, by user bketeyian, about the more deeply rooted struggles of men and women. He states that women are more likely to have low self-esteem, where as more men have ADHD, but also that women have better communication and verbal abilities where as guys have higher SAT math scores. There are so many pros and cons beyond what we see on a daily basis that go into the debate. Looking at it this way it seems we will never have an answer to this question, just a continuous pile of controversy. So where would you stand? Is either sex really worse? Or are we just both equally challenged by daily life and genetics?
You bring up a very interesting point! No gender really has it "worse" than the other. It is clear that both women and men face certain everyday struggles due to gender. Also, it is true that in history women were known to have it "worse." From giving up our identity and property rights to demanding the right to vote, women in history have put up quite the struggle. But like you said, sometimes you have to focus on the present instead of looking on the past. Now days, men face many struggles as well. Personally, I believe men have a hard standard to live up to. They are supposed to be portrayed as strong and masculine. If men do not live up to these standards they are called “wimps” or “weak,” examples from the video we watched in class.
ReplyDeleteBut how about we look at the issue in a new light. Shouldn't we all be proud of our gender and the things we have triumphed in and over came throughout history. Why not argue which gender is BETTER! Be positive and don't focus on the struggles, because honestly I don't necessarily see everyday struggles as a gender issue but more as a PERSON issue. Instead of complaining how bad your specific gender has it, start proclaiming how good you have it and be proud of where you came from.
I think this blog post brings up a really good point. Historically, women have absolutely had to overcome more barriers than men. Even today we are fighting for rights and opportunities that men have to put up much less of a fight for. No matter how you look at it there is absolutely no disputing that women have had to work much harder to be in the workplace and to be involved in any way politically. Getting out of the homes and into the office was not something women were supposed to do, and that was almost universally understood.
ReplyDeleteHowever, progress has been made and is still being made each day. Women are much more empowered and are much more represented both politically and professionally. This leads some to believe that men and women are now equals, but that is still widely debated and questioned. There are several issues such as the 'glass ceiling' when it comes to the compensation differences for the same work done by men and women.
With all of this being said, I do think men are put up against several obstacles that aren't brought to the attention of people the way women's obstacles are and have been in the past. There are a lot of societal pressures both genders are under and men have to undergo a lot that women don't necessarily have to. It's hard to say who has it worse and I think it has a lot to do with perspective and circumstances. Everybody has different struggles and problems and a lot of them are not brought on by gender at all. Looking at history, women have had it harder, but it is hard to say that every man has it better than any woman and vice versa.
I think this topic always brings up an interesting discussion, and is usually pretty defensive from each gender. Men typically argue that women have it easier, and our biggest argument is normally that women dominate sexual relationships. Women can pick and choose what guys they want to be courted by, or have relations with, and men basically have to sit back and hope their number gets called. Men that are overly nice to women tend to fall into the "friend zone", and men that are rude to women are generally kicked to the curb. There doesn't seem to be any middle ground on how to get a woman, it all depends on the individual woman, and her mood at that particular time.
ReplyDeleteThis argument, while something I agree with, holds very little weight in the discussion of which gender has it worse. Sure, guys have to work way harder to get a women, but that is among the very short list of disadvantages we live with. On average, men make more money, hold more positions of power, are more successful, and are dominant in many social, political, and economical aspects of life. The idea of childbearing alone makes being a woman a difficult task, but that barely scratches the surface of women's struggles.
Historically, women have been oppressed, and even today "equality" isn't as equal as people may think. Double standards are very prominent in today's society, and they almost all are in favor of the man. One metaphor that references the sexual double standard illustrates my point very well. "If a key unlocks many doors, it is a master key. If a lock is opened by many keys, it is a poor lock." As a man, I am not complaining about the advantages my gender is granted, but I don't see how anyone could truthfully believe that women have it better than men.
The topic of whether girls have it worse or boys have it worse brings up quite the debate. Whichever side of the argument you choose will most likely depend on your gender. Men will say women have it worse, and women will say that men have it worse. I don't believe there is any right answer to this debate of which gender has it worse. From my standpoint, I believe both genders face difficulties. Men are expected to be very manly and strong and good at spots, and many women must be skinny and look pretty all the time. Whichever way you view it, either gender could have it worse.
ReplyDeleteYou bring up the point of women historically having it worst than men, which is proven. Women have always struggled for rights and equality in the human race. They have fought for the same rights that men are given. Even today, women are still fighting for "equality". Men have always had the history of being above women and better than women.
In my opinion, I believe that we mostly focus on the struggle of women rather than men. Women always seem to be the topic of having it worse, because society chooses to only see it that way. In reality, both genders have struggles in their everyday lives. We must be able to recognize that each gender has their own weaknesses but also their own strengths.
It is hard to compare women and men in general. Genetically we are not the same, and in social settings we are not the same. There is no way to show which gender has it worse or has it better. It is like comparing apples and bananas, they are not the same. Men and women are not the same. Every individual human is not the same. We must recognize the difficulties that each gender faces, before we simply say that women or men have it worse for whatever reason. As you pose the question, we are both equally challenged.
The debate in class was quite amusing. I knew that if Dr. Whitson hadn't controlled it more, we would have been there for hours debating. It's the ultimate debate. Even as children we began deciding who had it worst, who was better than each other, just based solely on sex, because at the time, that was the only real difference that we actually understood (i.e. boys drool, girls rule). We have been taught from a young age through our peers, teachers (boys vs. girls in recess games) and parents, to always defend our sex. This brings back Lorber's argument of gender being socially constructed.
ReplyDeleteThis is goes back to falling into gender stereotypes. We always assume that all men feel that they have to be strong and therefor have it worse or that all women feel that they have to do their hair, makeup, nails and pick out a cute outfit before they walk out of the door. As a white heterosexual female discussing our list that we made in class the other day, I didn’t think about half of the stuff that were on the board, because I don’t do them. It’s not on my list of things to do routinely because I have better and more important things to be doing with my time, and realistically, none of us women can do all of those things in one day (there just isn’t enough time). I know that some men may not feel the need to work out and become buff or even shower everyday (even though that is gross and unhealthy, some feel that way). There are exceptions to all gender generalizations, and we sometimes forget about those when arguing on behalf of the entire female/male population in the ‘who has it worse’ debate.
I know that for me, personally, I don’t think that women have it that difficult anymore. I also don’t think that men ever had it that bad either. Sitting in class and hearing the debate back and forth, I was partially offended, and not by the men, but by the women. I don’t like feeling inferior to men, because I know that mentally and physically I am their equal, and the comments and arguments made me feel that way. Again, this is another sign of the way my gender was socially constructed, as I was raised mainly by my father.
I also think it would be amusing to see what Baby X would have to say if they were in our classroom during that debate. What they would have to say and if they would even realize a difference at all.
I do want to point back to the original post of the statistic that women have lower self-esteem than men. This is difficult to prove, I think. The majority of guys that I know that have felt comfortable enough with me, have all confessed that they are extremely self-conscious, more than most girls that I know. I feel that, yet again, they feel that society puts this pressure on them to not express their feelings of self-consciousness, and to work It out on their own, internally (which is not healthy). This is also true for domestic violence statistics. The majority of statistics that are found on the internet state that women are 97% of the time, victims are domestic violence, whereas men only make up 3% (also brought up in the film ‘Tough Guise’ that we watch in class). But have you ever stopped to think that the reason these statistics are so skewed to one side is because men have the societal pressure to not report abuse of any kind from a women. That wouldn’t be masculine and therefor unacceptable in society’s eyes.
With all of these variables that can never be accounted for properly and accurately displayed in statistics, I think that the debate of who has it worse will be never-ending, and pointless. Both genders have had their own battles and still do. In agreement with Karlee, I think we should focus on what accomplishments we have acquired instead of who has had the tougher road to get there.
-Alexandria Schell